Posts tagged sexual assault

Trigger Warning: from the UK’s “This is Abuse” campaign:

“Sex with someone who doesn’t want to is rape.”

TRIGGER WARNING: This is an incredibly powerful and triggering video on how anyone can prevent sexual assault and rape by watching out for friends, stepping in when something seems wrong, and saying something.

It is an important thing to instill in a younger generation about the impact of rape, the lasting impact of rape. Children from grade school to high school to college are incredibly susceptible and incredibly malleable, as we all know. To get them early, to teach them about the facts and figures and other realities of rape is key. It is an important issue to me as not only a man, but as an educator, as a human being and as a person on this planet.
Jon Hamm
From an early age, boys are fitted with emotional straight-jackets tailored by a restricted code of behavior that falsely defines masculinity. In the context of “stop crying,” “stop those emotions,” and “don’t be a sissy,” we define what it means to “Be a Man!” Adherence to this “boy code” leaves many men dissociated from their feelings and incapable of accessing, naming, sharing, or accepting many of their emotions. When men don’t understand their own emotions it becomes impossible to understand the feelings of another. This creates an “empathy-deficit disorder” that is foundational to America’s epidemic of bullying, dating abuse and gender violence. Boys are taught to be tough, independent, distrusting of other males, and at all cost to avoid anything considered feminine for fear of being associated with women. This leads many men to renounce their common humanity with women so as to experience an emotional disconnect from them. Women often become objects, used to either validate masculine insecurity or satisfy physical needs. When the validation and satisfaction ends, or is infused with anger, control or alcohol, gender violence is often the result.
Joe Ehrmann, former NFL player, from “Men Can Stop Rape”

Manhattan Housekeepers Get Panic Buttons

Housekeepers at the Pierre Hotel will get panic buttons in the wake of two highly publicized attacks on Manhattan hotel cleaners. The buttons are part of a deal hashed out between the management and the union.

The Sofitel Hotel, where form IMF head Dominique Strauss-Kahn allegedly attacked a housekeeper, has also agreed to equip housekeeping staff with panic buttons.

So they should! I wonder how many non-publicized sexual assaults have occurred at hotels all over the world… It makes me shudder to think.

Lara Logan breaks silence on Cairo assault

  • Logan: I had no idea how endemic that it is so rife, so widespread, that so many Egyptian men admit to sexual harassing women and think it's completely acceptable. In fact, blame the women for it.
  • Pelley: Why are you telling this story now?
  • Logan: One thing that I am extremely proud of that I didn't intend is when my female colleagues stood up and said that I'd broken the silence on what all of us have experienced but never talk about.
  • Pelley: What did they mean by that?
  • Logan: That women never complain about incidents of sexual violence because you don't want someone to say, "Well women shouldn't be out there." But I think there are a lot of women who experience these kinds of things as journalists and they don't want it to stop their job because they do it for the same reasons as me - they are committed to what they do. They are not adrenaline junkies you know, they're not glory hounds, they do it because they believe in being journalists.

“Rape is rape is rape,” says Biden.

On April 4, Vice President Joe Biden addressed Sexual Violence in a speech at the University of New Hampshire. Biden shared the experiences of Jenny (not her real name), a college freshman who was raped last year, New Hampshire Public Radio reported:

He said she’d been drinking at a party. And when she sought justice through the school, she was asked what she was wearing, how she was dancing, and whether she was sober.

“The student judicial panel said they didn’t find Jenny credible because she had been drinking. They decided her rapist was a nice kid and didn’t deserve the punishment under the circumstances,” Biden said….

But whether someone is drunk or sober doesn’t matter. As Biden put it, “Look folks - rape is rape is rape.”..

That’s one message that Biden hit hard: “Look guys - no matter what a girl does, no matter how she’s dressed, no matter how much she’s had to drink, it’s never, never, never, never OK to touch her without her consent. This doesn’t make you a man. It makes you a coward.”

The Feminist Majority Foundation encourages people to take action because there is much to be done between changing the definition of rape and reducing the backlog of rape evidence kits.

Happy Anti-Street Harassment Day!

Examples of the Types of Street Harassment, from Stop Street Harassment Survey:

  • Whistling, honking – 95%
  • Vulgar gestures – 82%
  • Sexually explicit comments – 81%
  • Following – 75%
  • Sexual touching – 56%
  • Public masturbation – 37%
  • Assault – 25%

On Guard Behavior: 

  • Avoid making eye contact – 69% (32% said they always do this)
  • Constantly assess their surroundings - 80% (62% said always)
  • Purposely wear clothes to attract less attention – 37% (10% always)
  • Talk on a cell phone – 42% (10% always)
Behavior that Limits their Access to Public Spaces:
  • Cross street/take other route - 50% (16% said always)
  • Avoid being out at night/after dark – 45% (11% always)
  • Avoid being out alone – 40% (8% always)
  • Pay to exercise at a gym instead of outside – 24%  (11% always)

Significant Life Decisions:

  • Moved neighborhoods (at least once) because of harassers in the area – 19%
  • Changed jobs (at least once) because of harassers along the commute – 9%
This is NOT acceptable. Read more on street harassment, its negative effects on women, and what you can do to stop it at iHollabackStop Street Harassment, or by reading books like Holly Kearl’s.